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Friendships at Work

by Debra Holland

Although some companies are bringing employees back to the office more and more lately, many are continuing with established remote and hybrid work schedules for the foreseeable future. Since the pandemic, making friends at work has been much more difficult. It doesn’t matter if you work in a small office or a large corporation, each has its challenges.  In order to accommodate hybrid work schedules and downsizing of space, companies have been known to stagger work schedules. Often this means employees, especially in the same department, are rarely in the office on the same days or at the same times. Making it harder to reestablish relationships or become friendly on the job, never mind forming friendships that extend beyond work. 

Prior to the pandemic it was much easier to make friends at work. When you're in the office with other people 40 hours a week, you get to know one another pretty quickly.  People have this inherent need to make connections and we spend 1/3 of our lives at work. Although not everyone will be best friends, we generally have friendly relationships with our co-workers. Friendships at work are actually good for you and good for your company, as they make you happier about your job and, believe it or not, more productive.

New employees and/or fully remote employees will have the biggest challenges making friends at work if they don’t already have a relationship established. Like any relationship, it is going to take effort, so be prepared to put yourself out there a little differently. The first thing you should do is make sure you are a reliable co-worker. How well you do your job is the first thing your co-workers will notice. Answer correspondence and messages in a timely manner and offer help when you can. If people enjoy working with you, they are more likely to engage with you for reasons outside of work. Assess your co-workers in the same way, notice who you like working with and if you can predict how they will interact with you. Don't be afraid to reach out with something small to start, no friendships were built in a day. If your worried that making the first move is going to be awkward, in this article, How To Make Friends As An Adult, the author introduced himself to a stranger every day for a month and found that the initial awkward feeling dissipates pretty quickly once the conversation starts.

Employers should be doing more to facilitate opportunities for their employees to establish friendships because the stats on employee engagement and having friends at work are highly correlated. According to a 2020 Muse Article: You need friends at work if you care about succeeding, 70% of employees said having friends at work is the most crucial element to a happy work life. It also stated a 25% increase in morale and productivity if you bring in a larger lunch table. So, let them gather and chat, give them space and opportunity to make friends because remote and hybrid work has taken the social aspect out of our work lives.

New Employees should feel welcome and included when onboarding, especially for a remote position. Assigning a mentor can assist with that as well as give your new employee a place to land with questions, but it’s even more beneficial if you are able to match two people who might have something in common, outside of work.  One of our recent interns was graduating college in the spring of 2022 and she was having a hard time finding an in-person position. She knew that having a mentor at work, especially right out of college, was imperative to her career growth and she didn’t see that relationship developing in the same way if she accepted a remote position. She was right to be concerned, it is harder forming relationships remotely. She held out for the in-person position and, last I heard, was doing great at her new job.

If you're still wondering how employee friendships benefit you and your company, here are some of the advantages of having a BFF at work:

• Increased job satisfaction and productivity - because friendships help you feel safe. When you feel safe, you are much more prone to contributing. Whether it be idea generation, asking questions, voicing your opinions, or getting what you need to be successful.
• Lower employee turnover - no one jumps out of bed every day eager to get to the office, but knowing your friend will be there today, perhaps with a coffee ready, makes it a lot more enjoyable.
• Reduced stress and burnout - having a friend at work to talk to when things aren't going right, one who understands completely and can commiserate, helps you to process externally, rather than internally.
• More Engaged - having a friend at work makes you more likely to enjoy your job and the company you work for, which increases your commitment to its mission and culture.

If you're looking for ways to offer your employees more time to get to know one another and possibly develop more meaningful relationships, we have many great ideas and several great team building programs. 

AC Anders (corporate)

[email protected] or 617-838-5691

Ken Abrahams (college)

[email protected] or 617-347-0720