Blog

Struggling to stay relevant.

November 9th, 2021 by Kenneth Abrahams

Age may just be a number to some but for me it’s much more than that. Nowadays, I look in the mirror and I see an old man starring back at me. What used to be a mane of dark brown hair is now gray/white with a receding hairline and minimal coverage. At times, my age is nothing more than the aches and pains one would expect from lifelong career that involves a lot of heavy lifting and shuffling of equipment, coupled with many, many miles on the road. At other times, it’s an ever widening gap between me and my clients.

With a client base of many 18 to 22-year old’s, I feel or am more cognizant of my age every day. How am I going to continue to provide value and stay relevant when our life experiences are so different? Growing up in the 1960’s and 70’s seems like more than 50 plus years ago. So much has changed. We have gone from phones being these big clunky things attached to your wall that had one purpose, to talk on, to small devices that you can run your lives and your homes from. Most homes back then had one small black and white television set that you often had to adjust those old rabbit ears antennas to get a somewhat decent picture to today’s televisions that are the size of a living room wall. Don’t feel like hanging out with the family and watching what others want to watch? Back in my day, watching tv was a privilege, no matter what was on. Today, simply go to your room and pop open your laptop or tablet to peruse other options. We had maybe 6 or 7 stations growing up, now there are hundreds on cable and what seems like an infinite number of streaming services.

Although I know who Billie Eilish is (I’m not a huge fan but I know her music) there are many more artists that are being talked about on campus that I don’t know and have never heard of. Yes, I agree that pop culture is not the end all be all and doesn’t define who I am or what I have to give, but it is a component that identifies generations. Ask me a question about MASH and I am in my comfort zone. You want to talk Tiger King and I am out in the cold. Some might consider this generational gap unbridgeable, but it isn’t about music, movies or tv shows, it is about shared life experiences. It is about being viewed as someone that can still contribute to their education, growth, and development. 10 – 15 years ago I was old enough to be the father, now I am approaching old enough to be gramps, poppa, or granddad. There is no question that I feel as if I can still connect and still contribute, but do they see that? Although things in the world of being a student leader have changed, many of the fundamentals of what they face haven’t.

Despite the fact that it wasn’t years ago but decades ago that I served on our program board and student government association, I still remember the pressure of friends trying to get me to blow off an event to go hang out with them. There were several conversations trying to explain to my mom and stepfather what I did on campus and why it was important. In the end, I think she finally got it. We had some great events that seemed to make it worth it, a Bonnie Raitt concert that was a sellout plus. We actually had students put a ladder up on the side of the building and come in on the second floor to see the show. There were also absolute failures when we booked a solo guitar player and the only people that showed up were the five of us working the event.

Successes and failures alike have helped shape who I am. There is a huge debt of gratitude that I need to pay for the opportunities that I had in college, as well as what this profession has afforded me. Despite having all this grey hair, I am not ready to pack it in. Knowledge gained from a lifetime of doing this stuff can still be valuable to students but how do I convince them that working with me is an asset? That I am not yet to the point of being a doddering old fool. Some may wonder why, as I got older, I didn’t take on more corporate clients. That answer is simple: college students have an energy that is refreshing, invigorating if you will. That energy makes me want to get up every day and get to my desk. When I am on site, I still like to chat with them and find out what makes them tick and where they are struggling. These events are my classroom, and they are my teachers.

Clearly, little can be done about my age so I will just have to keep plugging on and keep moving forward. Perhaps when they see my face, they see more than the receding gray hair and wrinkles that I see. Maybe, just maybe, they see some wisdom. Perhaps, even with a mask on they can see a smile or a twinkle in my eye. Hopefully, they see someone with more to give. I know that I feel like the tank is nowhere near empty. If I can help at all, please let me know.

About the author:

Ken Abrahams is a 1982 graduate of Connecticut College. His plan was to be in this business for 5 years, clearly plans change. Through his job, he has met and continues to meet some truly incredible people. Besides in what other job could he ever have had Mark Wahlberg sit on his lap, not once but twice?